On a more positive note...
Since the subject matter of the last two days dealt with regret I thought it was quite timely that I received the following two messages today in my in-box. They are not related (meaning not from same author or source) but coincidentally speak to each other.
Read 'em both and see what you think. I like them both very much. The second piece really is a reflection of what I did throughout my childhood, adolescence and even adulthood. My father used to tell me to "get out of fantasyland" and because that's not life. I, however, chose to enjoy the fantasies in my head. The fantasies of "what if" and "wouldn't it be great if" transported me from whatever I was not loving at the present time to a place where I both wished I could be and somehow just knew I had to be one day. In some cases those fantasies became realities. But the best thing about the process of my "fantasyland" was teaching myself, my brain, my spirit how to see/visualize that which I wanted. And since wishing for something only takes you so far a plan of action begins to be set in motion.
As usual I've bolded some of the key sentences that spoke to me.
xoxo
Don
If something really gnarly happens in your life and then you go seek help, in Western society many caretakers will tell you that you had some kind of "trauma". And then boom, once you hear that, most people identify with it and then, in some cases, that trauma becomes their identity, not just an event that happened in their life.
Let us review the definition of trauma from the good ole Merriam Webster's:
Trauma (N): A disordered psychic or behavioral state resulting from severe mental or emotional stress or physical injury.
A lot of people get so identified with what happened, that they stay there, always identified by what happened and, in many cases using that identification as an excuse not to grow.
Now, I am by NO MEANS diminishing that fact that crazy shit happens in life. Bad things happen to good people. There is all kinds of suffering in the world. But that doesn't have to be where we LIVE!
You see, there are some key words in Webster's definition. The first word is "state". The state you are in changes during the day. Sometimes you are in a sleep state, sometimes you are in a groggy state, sometimes you are in an excited state, and if you are lucky enough to be with a partner you Love and end up getting busy with them, you can be in a pretty excited state, too.
We humans can be in all kinds of different states. The state that we go into when we experience a trauma is totally normal and natural. But afterwards, because we are co-creators of our life, the state we stay in is up to us. This is why I love it when Tony Robbins said that there are no such thing as victims, because once the event happens it's up to us to choose to stay in a victim identity or choose an empowered story and become stronger.
I can hear some of you right now screaming, "YES MASTIN BUT I WAS ________" and then fill in the blank. I'm not saying that these things didn't happen and that in that moment you aren't a victim. Of course you are. But after that moment happens, how you live your life, where you choose to live emotionally is up to you and the meaning you give the events of your life! Moments of victimhood happen, a life of being a victim is chosen and we become a victim of our choice to identify with that moment, instead of growing past it.
The goal is not to avoid pain or to deny what happened to us; the goal is to learn that we have the power within us to change and that starts by not letting an event define us. Instead, we know that painful events happen and when they do, we give them an empowering meaning and choose not to relive and make our identity the trauma that we felt.
Who you are is infinite; you are a child of The Uni-verse and you have been sent here with a specific gift that is only yours to express. The events that happen, happen to shape us, to mold us and to help us step into who we are supposed to be. You are not broken. You do not need to be fixed. You are eternal and a part of a living Uni-verse that supports you. Give us your gift and don't stay stuck in a moment and let your whole life be defined by one event. You are so much more than that!
AND
You may feel optimistic today as you think about all the possibilities awaiting you. Your upbeat mood could inspire you to manifest the life you desire. It may be helpful for you to visualize your life as you would like it to be. Try imagining your life as a road stretching into the future. Along the road, you can picture places you would like to go and options you would like to explore. Watch as you walk down the road and see what you would like the future to bring. If you happen to visualize an obstacle, simply approach it with a positive frame of mind, smile, and continue along the way, knowing that the universe is guiding you. Creating a positive picture of the future today could help you prepare for these opportunities when they actually come into your life.
When you have a hopeful outlook toward life, you are better able to realize your dreams. From past experience, you may have noticed that your thought patterns form the world around you. You begin to perceive that your future reality can evolve from your current thoughts. If you think pessimistically, you are more likely to create negative situations in the future. By staying in a positive frame of mind, you construct a more promising reality. Imagining your future as a bright beacon of positive energy will pave the way for you to manifest what you want in life today.
Read 'em both and see what you think. I like them both very much. The second piece really is a reflection of what I did throughout my childhood, adolescence and even adulthood. My father used to tell me to "get out of fantasyland" and because that's not life. I, however, chose to enjoy the fantasies in my head. The fantasies of "what if" and "wouldn't it be great if" transported me from whatever I was not loving at the present time to a place where I both wished I could be and somehow just knew I had to be one day. In some cases those fantasies became realities. But the best thing about the process of my "fantasyland" was teaching myself, my brain, my spirit how to see/visualize that which I wanted. And since wishing for something only takes you so far a plan of action begins to be set in motion.
As usual I've bolded some of the key sentences that spoke to me.
xoxo
Don
If something really gnarly happens in your life and then you go seek help, in Western society many caretakers will tell you that you had some kind of "trauma". And then boom, once you hear that, most people identify with it and then, in some cases, that trauma becomes their identity, not just an event that happened in their life.
Let us review the definition of trauma from the good ole Merriam Webster's:
Trauma (N): A disordered psychic or behavioral state resulting from severe mental or emotional stress or physical injury.
A lot of people get so identified with what happened, that they stay there, always identified by what happened and, in many cases using that identification as an excuse not to grow.
Now, I am by NO MEANS diminishing that fact that crazy shit happens in life. Bad things happen to good people. There is all kinds of suffering in the world. But that doesn't have to be where we LIVE!
You see, there are some key words in Webster's definition. The first word is "state". The state you are in changes during the day. Sometimes you are in a sleep state, sometimes you are in a groggy state, sometimes you are in an excited state, and if you are lucky enough to be with a partner you Love and end up getting busy with them, you can be in a pretty excited state, too.
We humans can be in all kinds of different states. The state that we go into when we experience a trauma is totally normal and natural. But afterwards, because we are co-creators of our life, the state we stay in is up to us. This is why I love it when Tony Robbins said that there are no such thing as victims, because once the event happens it's up to us to choose to stay in a victim identity or choose an empowered story and become stronger.
I can hear some of you right now screaming, "YES MASTIN BUT I WAS ________" and then fill in the blank. I'm not saying that these things didn't happen and that in that moment you aren't a victim. Of course you are. But after that moment happens, how you live your life, where you choose to live emotionally is up to you and the meaning you give the events of your life! Moments of victimhood happen, a life of being a victim is chosen and we become a victim of our choice to identify with that moment, instead of growing past it.
The goal is not to avoid pain or to deny what happened to us; the goal is to learn that we have the power within us to change and that starts by not letting an event define us. Instead, we know that painful events happen and when they do, we give them an empowering meaning and choose not to relive and make our identity the trauma that we felt.
Who you are is infinite; you are a child of The Uni-verse and you have been sent here with a specific gift that is only yours to express. The events that happen, happen to shape us, to mold us and to help us step into who we are supposed to be. You are not broken. You do not need to be fixed. You are eternal and a part of a living Uni-verse that supports you. Give us your gift and don't stay stuck in a moment and let your whole life be defined by one event. You are so much more than that!
AND
You may feel optimistic today as you think about all the possibilities awaiting you. Your upbeat mood could inspire you to manifest the life you desire. It may be helpful for you to visualize your life as you would like it to be. Try imagining your life as a road stretching into the future. Along the road, you can picture places you would like to go and options you would like to explore. Watch as you walk down the road and see what you would like the future to bring. If you happen to visualize an obstacle, simply approach it with a positive frame of mind, smile, and continue along the way, knowing that the universe is guiding you. Creating a positive picture of the future today could help you prepare for these opportunities when they actually come into your life.
When you have a hopeful outlook toward life, you are better able to realize your dreams. From past experience, you may have noticed that your thought patterns form the world around you. You begin to perceive that your future reality can evolve from your current thoughts. If you think pessimistically, you are more likely to create negative situations in the future. By staying in a positive frame of mind, you construct a more promising reality. Imagining your future as a bright beacon of positive energy will pave the way for you to manifest what you want in life today.
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